Lots of little things makes someone really, really Danish… Here’s a few of our quirks.
Wear a lot of black.
For some reason, we still do this. Black trousers, tops, jackets.
Eat open sandwiches.
In the morning, topped with cheese and jam. Yes, jam. It’s a thing, this cheese and jam.
Get annoyed: Are you Dutch?
Throw the word “hygge” randomly into sentences, then pretend to try really hard to find an English translation. Yet again.
Never use the word please, with the excuse that “but we don’t HAVE a word for please in Danish” (we really don’t, you know…)
Test ANY non-Dane on whether they like salty liquorice – and laugh when they don’t (as you watch them squirm).
Have an awkward sense of humour and laugh at Nordic jokes such as “Do you know how to save a Swede from drowning? No? Good!” HarHarHarHar…
See also: making fun of everything Swedish. And Norwegian. And Icelandic. And German. #hilarious
You don’t eat Swedish meatballs. Because they are SWEDISH. In Denmark, we eat DANISH meatballs. Don’t confuse the two. Danish meatballs are bigger and better and probably pays more tax and can balance on one leg whilst humming ‘Der Er Et Yndigt Land’.
Get excited when you see THIS. A bowl of some white soup with biscuits. If you’re Danish, you know this means: Summer. Cold, sweet buttermilk soup with delicious biscuits (Koldskål med kammerjunkere).
Have a flagpole in your garden and raise the Danish flag at every opportunity (Sundays, public holidays, birthdays, announcing you’re popping to the shops…). Add smaller Danish flags on sticks to your cakes, Christmas tree, window, walls. The more the more Danish you are.
If someone asks you how you are, be sure to really explain to them how you are really feeling.
Top most food groups with a dollop of remoulade. Especially chips, beef, fish and hotdogs. And salami. And meatballs.
Remoulade is the best thing in the whole world. Danes don’t bother with ketchup for their chips – it is all about remoulade.
Speak as you take an in-breath
As one of only a few languages, we sometimes speak on an in-breath, usually saying ‘yes’ (‘ja’).
Try it, it’s weird.
Always have one white sock over one trouser leg (or roll one trouser leg up, if not wanting to wear white socks over your all-black outfit). You never know when you might be going cycling. This way, you can be ready in a flash.
This is a word. It has many different meanings, depending on how you pronounce it:
Learn the many more different ways of pronouncing ‘NÅ’ and you can pass for a Dane just using one word.
Do you know other ways that makes someone more Danish? We’d love to hear them…