How to be a bit more Viking
Here are a few simple pointers to be more Viking in your daily life.
Every week, we give a little lesson on how to be a bit more Scandinavian in your everyday life. If you’d like the full-length version of these lessons direct into your inbox every Friday morning, simply click here to sign up.
A good name will ensure people remember you.
Anyone remember Brian? Pete? Joe? No. But they sure do remember Thorfinn Skull-splitter. And Sigurd Snake-in-the-Eye. Eysteinn the Fart didn’t go unnoticed either, for his antics after a night on the mead.
Oh, yeah, and we all remember Thord the Coward. And Ulf the Unwashed. And Hallfred the Troublesome Poet.
Navigate by using ravens.
Vikings used ravens to navigate the longships. They gave up quickly on seagulls as these only led to chip shops.
During the next train strike, pick up a few ravens and let them help you find your office.
Dye your hair blonde.
Both Viking men and women enjoyed dying their hair blonde, using lye (probably best not to use lye – ask your hairdresser for current alternatives). The dye kept the lice at bay – and it made them all pretty. Because they’re worth it.
Hairstyle: Short fringe and long at the back. A mullet, really. Grow a mullet. Add a beard for extra oomph.
If you’re a Viking man, grow a beard.
Good beards were signs of manhood. No beard = not a real man. Think hipster, amplified (less pointy shoes). Add an axe and a shield.
Note that Viking men were very well-groomed, not wildly haired beasts. Indeed, combs and tweezers were found in Viking graves.
Drink more mead (Mjöd).
An underrated drink that really deserves a comeback. We see it as a good alternative to your local pint of lager – maybe soon, East London pubs will start serving it on on tap, we’re sure. Possibly served in a drinking horn.
Wear more eyeliner.
Vikings – both men and women – used to wear eyeliner, a type of kohl around the eyes – and likely also other forms of make up.
Treasure your Bluetooth.
Did you know that the Bluetooth logo/sign is a rune script for H and B? And the name comes from Harold Bluetooth – the last king of a united Scandinavia, as he was really good at connecting people.
Girl power
Viking women could demand a divorce from their partners. Reasons for divorce could be plenty – from bed-hopping to poverty – or even the showing of too much chest hair. You’re maybe within right to threaten your husband with divorce if he opens the third shirt button next time he’s dancing at a family wedding.
Only write in runes.
Ideally carved into stone. Do not use this technique if asked to take notes at a meeting; you’ll be there forever and nobody appreciates it nowadays.
The power of Mjölnir.
It is not unusual to see Scandinavians today wear a pendant of Mjolnir – Thor’s Hammer – necklace around their neck. It’s definitely a look.
Go skiing more.
The Viking loved skiing so much they even had a God of Skiing – his name was Ullr.
Do what can’t be done.
The Vikings didn’t fear the unknown, nor did they fear battle or even death. They traveled. They discovered. Imagine what the world today would look like if we hadn’t done that?
